Discussion: The Compulsion for Completion

Hi everyone,

Thanks for all your sharing yesterday in cell as we discussed about "The Compulsion for Completion". If you are unable to join us, here's a link to the video.



I really hope that this series on relationships will really bless you as it has blessed me, as it provides us with the opportunity and platform to reflect on our own relationships, gather some insights as well as help us further enhance our relationships. The following discussion is based on Dr Les and Leslie Parrott's book "Relationships".

What's the Big Deal with Relationships?
But before we begin, really, what's the big deal with relationships? I may not know, but if you ask me, I would guess that maybe books on relationships will never "go out of fashion" simply because we all know the fact that it is so real in our lives, something that we have to deal with every single day from the moment we get out of bed (if fact, relationships can even get to us even while we are still in bed thinking).

Of course, before we go on here, for clarity's sake, it would be good to define our scope of discussion. Just like how we went about yesterday's discussion, we clarified that we would be focusing here on human-to-human relationship and not relationships of "other kind", as we jokingly mentioned, to handbags or cars etc. And the relationships we would be referring to here is not just husband-wife relationships but relationships of all form, between parent and child, between friends, between us and colleagues and our superiors etc.

But really, if we were to ask this question: "What's the big deal with relationships?", what would your response be? Your response might include some, if not all or most of the following:

• A Basic Need - We need relationships because no man's an island and in our basic make-up, we have a need for love, affection, sense of belonging and dependence on others;
  
• God Commands Us - Relationships are important because we are commanded to "Love your neighbor as yourself." (Matthew 22:39, NIV). Jesus further emphasized in John 13:34-35 (NIV) "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”
  
• Connection & Intimacy - We need relationships because it makes us human as we are able to connect with someone else, share our inner world and experience closeness and intimacy;
  
• Companionship in Life - We need relationships because it makes the journey of life less lonely knowing that we journey together. As it is written in Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12 (NIV):
  
  Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor:
  If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.
  But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.
  Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?
  Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
  
  
• Continuity of this World - We need relationships because you can't imagine how we would be destroying ourselves if this world is full of hate of one another;
  
• Complement & Completion - We need relationships because we feel that the other person would complement or even complete us;
  
• Peace - Relationships are important because one can really be in turmoil when relationship goes foul;
  
• Growth - We need relationships because it is through it that we can grow as we learn from others and also allow others the permission to speak into our lives, and
  
• Learning to be Christ-like - Lastly, as I ponder about it, I seem to also realise how we need relationships because, how else can we learn to be Christ-like except through learning to relate and love God's people, even though how imperfect they may seem.

It was little wonder how during worship, I came to realise God's amazing love for us, even though we seem so unworthy, as we sang the song "Forever Reign":

You are good, You are good... When there's nothing good in me...
You are hope, You are hope...You have covered all my sin...
You are true, You are true... Even in my wandering
You are here, You are here... In Your presence I'm made whole

The Compulsion VS Desire for Completion
But even as we inspect the list of reasons why relationship may be important to us, there is one which we focused on yesterday, about the compulsion for completion.

As Trina has shared yesterday, there is nothing wrong having the desire to be complete because it is good to want to be complete. But when it becomes a compulsion, so much so we start grabbing on everything except the right source to complete us, it becomes a problem. In the video, Dr Les and Leslie Parrott mentioned if we try to build intimacy with somebody else BEFORE we have done the hard work of getting whole on our own, all our relationships will be an attempt to complete ourselves and they will fall flat. Now read that again to see if you get it.

The Compulsive Self-Talk Within
Do you know that we are talking to ourselves every single moment in our mind, making statements, asking questions and even making evaluations of ourselves and others. Psychologists, counsellors and social workers would call this "self-talk". And in this compulsion, it's kind of like saying to yourself "I'll feel more as a person when..." and you can fill this blank. And this continuation can be "... people praise me" or "I am around this person", kind of like Anne in the video.

Now, as we discussed yesterday, there is nothing wrong with e.g. wanting affirmation from our bosses for hard work done but it becomes a problem when our sense of worth, identity and significance rest solely on that. It is like our self worth will fluctuate up and down depending on our bosses' mood that day and if he would or would not praise us. There is nothing wrong from wanting to please our loved ones, but when we go all out to do that just to feel more complete/significant as a person, then it might be a sign of something that needs fixing.

This is a different issue from just being different and complementing one another e.g. how one person is more meticulous while another is creative and how they can work together. Rather it is about the compulsion in us that focuses on completion via another rather than a healthy belief on how others can complement us. In a complementing relationship, I would guess that a person's world may not crumble when the other person exits as much than in a "compulsion for completion" relationship.

I am kind of reminded once again of a struggle that I have for a long time, but to a lesser degree now. For many years, I built my life and my significance on affirmations and praises from others and this carried on for many years. But one day, God knows that it was not getting healthy for me and so came a trial where everything came crashing down within the same period. It was a painful lesson but yet, I am able to come to realisation and even in the process came back to the Lord because of it. Though I have yet to completely overcome it, with little bouts of attack now and then in my relationships, work and even ministry, I am more in tune with this kind of self-talk and know that I can build my sense of worth on someone greater and eternal, God. In recent years, I have also come to realise how God can also do His restorative work in this area, through His church, His community, the spiritual family He has given us. Yes, this community is made up of imperfect people but let's also remember that this community is also made up of people who love God and His people and who would offer of themselves and their life experiences and giftings; allowing God to work in and through them.

The A-Frame Relationship
Perhaps, an illustration would help here. I kind of like the "A-frame relationship" analogy used by Dr Parrott to illustrate this. In trying to find a good image, I kind of like the following image I found on the net which kinds of say it all:

You can hear him speak about the "A-Frame Relationship" in a video here, taken from his website.


Source: http://www.realrelationships1.com/videos/CR/parrottT1005.php

Out of this interesting illustration, something did hit me: Your relationships can only be as healthy as the least healthy person in them. 

The Compulsive Need to be Needed
And in such a relationship, as there are two sides of an "A", so there could also be 2 lies/erroneous self-talk in it. One, the lie that "I NEED this person to be COMPLETE" is already covered quite substantially here. But yet, there is also another possible lie, which I do sometimes also encounter in my line of work with some volunteer and this is the lie that "If this person needs ME, I will be COMPLETE". Again, there is nothing wrong in wanting to feel that one has significance but when it goes to the other extreme where it becomes a strong need or compulsion for completion via this lie, then again, it would not be healthy.

Reviewing our Relationships
I believe that many of us may need to review our relationships to see if we have either of these lies in them. Being in an "A-frame" relationship not only is unstable but may also, as I ponder, provide the lack of motivation for us to grow as a person since we are "completed" momentarily; there is just no impetus to address parts of us that needs addressing. I would think that we should always be on the lookout for relationships where we will not compulsively need that person but yet can be challenged to grow as a person.

Working Towards Wholeness
Each of our journeys to wholeness is unique but in the video Drs Parrott suggests 4 principles to working towards wholeness...

1. Heal our hurts
   I would believe none of us are without hurts. Big or small hurts, we can perhaps remember someone who has hurted us in the past, either intentionally or unintentionally.
   
   And yet, we know that we are to forgive and such reminders can be found all throughout the bible. But none can say it better than Colossians 3:13 (NIV) "Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.".
   
   No one says that forgiveness is easy. Forgiveness is not condoning what was done. It is going to take some time and also strength from God. As Benny Ho mentioned, forgiveness is a "willing not a feeling". I can't imagine God forgiving us based on His feelings. But no! He is willing to forgive us as we confess our sins and repent.
   
   In the same way, I guess the first step is a willingness to forgive; to refuse to let ourselves be trapped by our hurts and release ourselves from the pain, all with the help of God. Go on, do it for yourself, if not for the person. And yes, sometimes the hurt and hate comes back to haunt us again and again, much like a video playback in our minds, sometimes even with surround sound! And that's all the more we need God to help us go through it.
   
   I am reminded of the story of Corrie Ten Boom who lost her beloved sister in WWII after being tormented in a German concentration camp. And yet, in 1947, when she was speaking on God's forgiveness in Munich, she was presented the circumstance where she was approached by a man, who she recognised was one of the guards who mistreated her and her sister, asking for her forgiveness. You can read more in the article "How can I Forgive?". What would you do if you were presented with a "Corrie Ten Boom" moment today?
   
   It's interesting how God showed me this valuable lesson just yesterday, before cell, when I was approached by an auditor from my funding organisation to audit me. But I found myself in a "Corrie Ten Boom" situation because this was the very person who I felt backstabbed me during my attachment many years ago. I was still concerned how I would behave towards her when she comes. Will it be awkward? Will I be phoney? But thank God, that I was able to just interact with her and talk to her naturally and it seemed mutual. Did I have the ability to do it? I think not and I only can thank God for that. But yet, I am reminded how I have other hurts, some as recent as weeks ago, which I need to deal with, even though I am not very willing.
   
   Do you have a hurt which is holding you back from the life that God has for you? Do you have a hurt which keeps playing back and it seems so difficult to shake off? Then take this time to pray and commit it to God, because you cannot do it on your own. If not dealt with, you will continue your life with this sting holding you back in your relationships, waiting to be triggered again and again. And it will not be surprising how the same unresolved hurt will keep resurfacing and repeating itself again and again.
   
   
2. Remove Your Masks
   I choose to believe that no one intentionally puts on a mask. Masks might be a way to make ourselves feel better as we project a self which is not our real self and try our best to keep up that pretense. And yet, this could be an attempt to again complete ourselves because we feel we need to be that self to be accepted. It might be caused by our upbringing or even past hurts where we are taught that it is a mistake to be real because we become vulnerable.
   
   But think about it, what's the effect of this coping mechanism? I can only think how relationships in such a life can be rather shallow because effort is just sent on keeping the alternative persona(s) rather than on building deep relationships. And it is tiring. It is also very difficult to have deep relationships because people will sooner or later come to realise how your real self is just so incongruent with the projected self and may just feel disappointed, threatened and distance themselves. Even if someone comes along and wants to get to know the real you, they will eventually give up if the pretense continues. The result is often confusion, frustration with the lack of deep relationships, tiredness and even possible bitterness with how things always turn out.
   
   
3. Sit in the Driver's Seat
   The next thing Drs Parrott suggest is to take the driver's seat. It's easy to be passive and to move through life forever reacting to circumstances. But, if we are to want to turn things around, we need to be proactive and start doing something about it ourselves, even to seek out help e.g. with a pastor, with healing and wholeness, share with our PAP (Prayer & Accountability Partners) and allowing them to speak into our lives without being too defensive, recognising that it is shared in good faith to help us grow. Sitting down to watch a film, reading a book, attending a seminar, listening to a sermon and seeing a therapist are good, but it is not going to help until we do the hard work of being whole.
   
   
4. Rely on God
   But ultimately, rely on God because only God can meet our ultimate needs, not anyone else. No one can ever fill all our needs except for God. I do feel it's good here to qualify that needs are different from wants, or so we learnt in foundational social work studies in university. Many things which we feel are our needs are actually our wants; we won't die if we do not have it. But yet, there are things which we need and God, who created us, knows us and what we need. I like something written in the leader's guide for this session: "Only God can ultimately and consistently love us when we are moody, when we make mistakes, and when we feel rejected and unloved by the person we counted on the most".
   
   And here is Dr Leslie Parrott with "one lesson to transform every relationships":
   
   Source: http://www.realrelationships1.com/videos/CM/parrottT1004.php
   
   My prayer for you, as I prepared for the session yesterday is this, uttered by Paul in Ephesians 3:17-19 (NIV) "(so that) Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. "
   
   I pray that (i) not only will Christ dwell in you, (ii) that you will come to realise how wide, long and high and deep He loves you, (iii) that you have power as you are together with God's people and (iv) be filled with all the FULLNESS of God. Only when you realise how you are so loved by God that you will have this profound sense of significance. Only God can complete you and give you to power to be filled to His completion. So where are you looking for completion?

I sincerely pray that may what has been written be not of just human wisdom, but that it will go forth in God's power to change your life and many others as He inspires me to write this. Take care and God bless you!

James

Riverlife's Core Value 2: Transformation in People

Hi everyone, thanks for all your prayers for my slip disc. I am getting better by the day and it's amazing how from I was bed-ridden a few days ago, not being able to do anything, to being able to walk a little today. I am amazed at the progress made and even the peace that came upon me yesterday as cell came by. Couldn't have been recovering so well if not for all your prayers and well-wishes. Thanks again!

Video Sermon: Transformation in People

This is the 2nd sermon on this series and SP Vincent re-emphasized the importance of unity and not uniformity. Having a set of core values can be instrumental in keeping unity in the church as they influence the way we conduct ourselves, make decisions and how we disciple others.

This week’s core value is “Transformation in People” and this is about discipleship. God made man in His image (Genesis 1:27) and so, the church is about people. It is about us being created in God’s image though ours is blemished by sin. Yet for those of us who are believers, the Spirit of God transforms us to redeem and restore us into His image. It is about our hearts turning towards God while we grow in our passion for Him and loving people wholeheartedly. This is so because God’s heart is for the people, especially for the poor and the needy (2 Cor 3:18).

SP Vincent challenged us to grow our church into one with “a heart for people” and to seek godly transformation in them. To fulfill this vision, we are to:

1. Commit to reach the unsaved and disciple them
We are to develop a lifestyle of evangelism and obey the Great Commission (Matthew 28:19-20). There’s no true transformation without salvation and renewing of the mind (Romans 12:2). Hence, the importance of discipling new believers.

2. Believe in people and their God-given potential
We are to value and love our neighbours (Luke 10:25-37, Matthew 25:31-46) and pray for them to fulfill their God-given potential (Ephesians 4:11-12).

3. Be responsible for our own spiritual growth and development
Just as we’ve learnt to feed our physical body, we must also learn to feed ourselves spiritually (Hebrews 5:11-6:3). We are to take personal responsibility for our spiritual maturity (Ephesians 4:14).

4. Create conducive environments for life-long learning and growing
Transformation happens when people experience God. Thus, we must seek to create a faith environment where one can experience the spiritual and the supernatural. We may do this through fasting and prayer.

SP Vincent further exhorted us to consider what makes our day. What brings us delight?

What is the church about at the end of the day? Though we may grow weary we must not lose the heart for people. This is because people matters to God and they should matter to us too. Let us examine our “heart capacity” for God and for people, and believe in His transformation work for ourselves and for others.

I was particularly challenged by SP as he asked us a few questions during the sermon. Have you thought about them for yourself?

• What drives you? What do you live your life for?
  
• What makes your day?
• Do we have a heart to reach and disciple them?
• Do we believe in people, their value and their God-given potential?
• Are we doing our part to grow spiritually?
• Are our gatherings e.g. Sunday services, cell group meetings etc conducive for transformation and growth?

Transformation and OL3
What would your response to that be? Perhaps about the part on whether our cell group meetings are conducive for transformation and growth, maybe you can also share your views with me how we can help OL3 to grow further for that to be possible.

Spiritual Growth & Transformation
The discussion on being responsible for our spiritual growth and development was particularly insightful too. As Raymond shared, we need to understand what this means contextually in transformation in people.

We are told to grow from strength to strength in our faith. In Ephesians 4:11-15, we are told to grow in maturity and not be easily swayed by deceit in the world:

Ephesians 4:11-15 (NIV)
11It was he who gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelists, and some to be pastors and teachers, 12to prepare God's people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up 13until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.

14Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of men in their deceitful scheming.

1 Peter 2 also implore us to grow up in our salvation:

1 Peter 2:2-3 (NIV)
2Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, 3now that you have tasted that the Lord is good.

It becomes clear to us that we are to grow in our spiritual maturity. But the question remains why? Why do you think we need to grow? When we become transformed personally, we are obedient to God's word of calling to grow spiritually.

When We Grow... We Make God Known
God's heart is to redeem, reconcile with and restore His people. But He does not only want to stop at one. His heart is for all, who Christ died for so that they can be reconciled to God.

Perhaps, John 10 provides a vivid imagery of this:

John 10:14-16 (NIV)
14"I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me— 15just as the Father knows me and I know the Father—and I lay down my life for the sheep. 16I have other sheep that are not of this sheep pen. I must bring them also. They too will listen to my voice, and there shall be one flock and one shepherd.

Luke 15 also shows how heaven rejoices when sinners repent and those who are lost are found.

This is the heart of God.

And as we grow and shine, we glorify and make God known to others too, as they see our light and praise God:

Matthew 5:14-16 (NIV)
14"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. 15Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. 16In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.

When We Grow... We Allow Others to be Transformed
Chek Shih also shared about how when we become too comfortable and choose not to grow, we ultimately takes up resources. How do we then reach out to receive more into God's kingdom when our ministry resources are focused on people who refuse to grow spiritually i.e. only wanting to remain as spiritual babies? Instead, we need to raise up more to share God's love and how He can help transform lives through His people and His community.

Matthew 9:36-38 (NIV)
36When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. 37Then he said to his disciples, "The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. 38Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field."

Are we ready to have our lives brought to the next level with God and also to help others' lives be transformed? We are all, after all, called to the ministry of reconciliation:

2 Corinthians 5:17-20 (NIV)
17Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! 18All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: 19that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. 20We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God.

How Then Do We Grow Spiritually?

Learning from Professional Development
It's interesting how there is so much correlation between our professional growth and spirtual growth. Chek Shih asked what would we do if we want to advance and grow professionally... well, we will go for the right courses, read the right books, look for the right mentors, join professional groups for growth, spending time practicing etc... It is the same with growing spiritually and in the same way, we can go for the right Christian Education courses, read the right books or even better, reading directly from God's word. looking for mentors or even spiritual growth partners, spending time in our quiet time with the Lord, praying etc.

Learning from Relationships
If the Christian faith is about relationship with God, how can we develop our relationship with God when it is just mainly through books and courses; we need to spend time with the Lord Himself.

In addition, we cannot rely solely on our spiritual leaders to develop our relationship with the Lord in the same way we cannot solely rely on others to develop our personal relationships; we need to develop that relationship ourselves.

Just as people grow closer together in relationships and who may even start to understand and share the same perspective of seeing things, we will also start to see and share God's heart as we continue to spend time with Him.

Are we transformed and helping many others' lives to be transformed?

The Essence of our Faith

Our Father in heaven,

hallowed be your name,

your kingdom come,

your will be done

on earth as it is in heaven.

Give us today our daily bread.

Forgive us our debts,

as we also have forgiven our debtors.

And lead us not into temptation,

but deliver us from the evil one.

Matthew 6: 9-13 (NIV)

For many of us, myself included, this is a very familiar prayer. The Lord's Prayer is the model of prayer which the Lord Jesus taught His disciples on how to pray.

More Than Mere Words
I remember days in the past when I used to recite this daily in school, not fully appreciating the prayer and what it means. At that time, I just know it as something which I needed to say every morning, mouthing literally empty words and not knowing what it means to pray the Lord's prayer.

In fact, the Lord Jesus warned about the heart condition when praying; that it should not be "for display" of one's holiness or one which has lots of babbling of words. In Matthew 6:8 it tells us that our Father knows what we need before we even ask Him. So, Jesus teaches us the Lord's Prayer and as we discussed about it yesterday, I have come to realise how amazing it is that a short prayer like this can cover quite a bit. In 52 words, it covers our desire to praise God, to pray for God's kingdom, for God's will, for our daily needs, a reminder for us to forgive as we have been forgiven by God, to pray for God to guide us in our walk with Him and to help us in our daily struggles with sin and the enemy.

The Lord's Prayer sets the background for Dr Joseph D' Souza's sharing last week and I would say it was a refreshing perspective for me. For a long time, even after having appreciated the Lord's Prayer, I have thought of it mainly as a prayer for myself but the sermon has challenged me and helped me see how it is also for God's children too:

• "Hallowed be your name" (v 9) -
  
  Application for Self - Do we desire to hallow God's name, glorifying it? Is God just a genie who brings you out of the pits and who continues to grant your wishes or is there something more to it? How are we hallowing His name? Do we sometimes even profane His name through the things we do, just like how some shared about believers being a bad testimony? How do we deal with that when we see it?
  
  Application for our relationship with others - Hallow His name as we help others with their difficulties, help them to know God, draw near to Him and even praise Him. But how will others praise God when they do not even know Him? Dr Joseph D' Souza mentioned that many, like the Dalits (the untouchables), do not know that they are made in the image of God and that He loves them. As someone have put it nicely, you might be the only way in which people can see Jesus. What are you doing about this? Are you helping others to know God, to have His power work in their lives and praise Him?
  
  Matthew 5: 14-16 (NIV)
  "You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.
  
• "your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as in heaven" (v10) -
  
  Application for our relationship with others - in this part of the prayer, there is not only a desire to see God's kingdom be established and His will be done, it also provides us an opportunity to respond to His work. Dr. D'Souza aptly highlighted about how even in the most advanced and greatest kingdom on earth, there will still be hurting, lonely people. Perhaps, as KK has shared, we will never get to fully fathom the full extent of the greatness of God's kingdom now but we may each have a part of the kingdom to show others. What is your picture of God's kingdom that you can show others? Are you showing it? Do you trust that God can work through you in having His will be done here? Do you have faith that you can play an instrumental role in having God's will be done here on earth as in heaven?
  
  See the parable of the cracked pot.
  
• "Give us today our daily bread" (v 11) -
  
  Application for self - For many of us, this might be what constitutes as a major part of our prayer and yet for others, it might be a struggle as they continue to wonder if they can trust in the Lord to provide for their needs. Just as we are reminded in a later part of Matthew 6 (after the Lord's prayer), in Matthew 6: 25-34, we are assured that God knows what we need and He provides. Nerve-wrecking as it may be for some but the fact is that God provides even though it may not be in the way we expect it. But on the other extreme, I am also reminder that our God is not a genie or like one of pagan gods where our only prayers are just about blessings.
  
  Application for our relationship with others - But importantly, as Joshua has shared, upon reflecting why we have been given so much while others lack, what does it tell you? As Gary Haugen said it aptly in Global Leadership Summit 2008 (something which made me think and which is stuck with me as I walk with the Lord): Why have we been given so much amidst suffering of others? So we can be a channel of blessing from God to others.
  
• "Forgive us our debts, as we also forgiven our debtors" (v 12)
  
  Application for self & relationship with others - I was doing quiet time this week and I have come to realise how we are called to love one another. Ideally, this is good, because we have been reminded in scriptures by Jesus, to love God and our neighbours; the greatest commandment of all (Matthew 22: 36-40). But, I do know sometimes we have people who fail us and it becomes difficult to dispense forgiveness. But yet we are reminded by Christ not to let the sun go down while we are still angry. In my life experiences so far, I have learnt that the person who lose out is usually myself; in my anger and unforgiveness, I live a life of defeat and of bitterness. At the end of the day, it robs us of joy and it also divides us.
  
  See articles on dealing with unforgiveness and anger.
  
• "And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one" (v13) -
  
  Application for self - We are reminded how we are not to play around with sin and to ask for God to be around us to help us resist the enemy and his schemes in our lives, whose aim is to derail us from God's love... We need God's power in helping us to deal with this daily.
  
  Application for relationship with others - Dr. Joseph D'Souza points to the need for social justice and how it is not enough to just treat the wounded but also to stop the perpetrator in continuing to do harm, but through righteous ways. We saw how Jesus had been held back in His dealings with the Pharisees and religious leaders whose hearts were hardened and who misguided His people from following God. He rebuked them on several occasions. In the same way that we may be the only way in which others can see Jesus, how can we help others who are oppressed by evil and do so in righteous ways?

The Christian Faith
After having gone through the Lord's Prayer, I continue to do my quiet time through the week. God made me reflect on what the Christian faith is really all about. Though I am not trained theologically, the arbitrary conclusion I got as I read His word is that the faith is about reconciliation with God, both for ourselves and for other people.

It is, as Jesus has put it, about loving God and our neighbours as ourselves.

God has saved us from the pits but then it does not stop there. God loves His children as well and He does not want "anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentence" (2 Peter 3:9). You are valuable to Him but so are His other children.

The apostle John wrote in 1 John 4: 9-12, which spoke to me this week:

"This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us. "

The command is clear: love God and your neighbour, God's fellow children.

And James clearly states that your love without action or faith without deed, is dead. See article on "Faith without Deeds vs Love and Action"

We can learn from Jesus as He came to show us the way to proclaim our faith, not merely through words but also through action just as He went around and made a difference by healing, speaking the truth, forgiving people of their sins and giving them hope and peace.

How will you respond to this?

Remain in me, and I will remain in you

Hello everyone!

Thanks for all your sharing yesterday and for blessing me. Personally, it has been really wonderful seeing God at work throughout the whole week even at cell. And it was also great singing and worshipping the Lord in both English and Mandarin :D

有一位神


一切歌颂赞美


Spirit Touch Your Church


I thank God for showing an object lesson on John 15 as I went about the past week. Sometime during midweek, I had just suddenly felt so tired and weary with ministry that I wanted to give up. I had been holding on and trusting in the Lord for working in everyone and every aspect of cell. And I can see Him work. Frankly, I can see the purpose God has for this cell taking shape but then I was really getting all weary; I asked if I am indeed bearing fruit or if someone else would do a better job. I got so tired I told God I had wanted to call it quits (one more time).

But God sent me people and verses to encourage and also circumstance to make me reflect upon it. He sent me Min Qin to remind me with Jeremiah 29:11 which appeared when I was called back to the Lord after years of backsliding. Do I believe in God's plans for me? Yes! Then, God brought Psalm 1 on Wednesday evening about the tree planted by streams of water and even on Thursday during corporate devotion, reminding me about being staying with the streams of water to be nourished. It seems that I was reminded that, just as trees have seasons, so will my life, but whatever happens, the streams of water is still there to not only sustain me but also nourish me. When I think back, God had been faithful in my ministry and has helped me through.

Then a volunteer came to meet me and we started talking about our spiritual walk. I thank God for bringing a volunteer to come to visit on Thursday and how we talked about our spiritual walk. I thank God for using me to encourage this volunteer and for also using him to show me about remaining in God's word. It was really evident that God used the session because I can tell He is present whenever conversations just flowed and I become amazed at the things I say; things that in the end also blessed me. Though I had not been prepared for the talk, God had helped me share about my own walk and how I had come to see God's word as powerful and also ministering, always at the right time. This young volunteer had shared how he is not part of any church (though he is looking) and how he is inspired by praise and worship music but finds reading the bible rather a chore. He was taught by someone that as long he prays, it will be OK. But I felt a prompting to share with him how I too had struggle to read the bible but over the past 3 years, God had spoken through His word far too many times and soon it became cool to read His word because I had wanted to know what He had to say about certain things in my life and also to get to know Him better. And as I shared, stories of several people like Horatio Spafford, John Newton and Eric Liddell (as portrayed in the movie "Chariots of Fire") came to mind. I personally did not know how blessed he was but I personally was blessed through the words that God had gave me and spoken through my mouth.

Then I shared that earlier on in the week, I was affected when I saw a leader of the Lord, a pastor, reacting in an ungracious manner. I had really been very disappointed by the whole incident. Though I do not know this pastor or work with him, I was frankly affected and decided to write him an email on Monday. I prayed to God that I would type the email with the focus to edify than to vent my anger. I thank God things worked out well and for helping me as I penned the email. Frankly, I had not expected the pastor to respond but he did and emailed to apologise. At the end, I was glad things turned out well and was resolved but most importantly, my disappointment went away because the pastor had humbly acknowledged his mistake. I myself can sometimes be ungracious and this seems to be a reminder that I needed to also remain in God's ways; asking "What Would Jesus Do?" more often to keep myself in check.

I thank God for showing me, before cell started, that what has happened throughout the week, has showed me what it means to "remain in Him" (John 15:4) i.e. to remain in His WILL for me and my ministry and his WORK of reaching out to people, to remain in His WAY from my reflection on the disappointment with the pastor, to remain in His WORD from my reflection on my talk with the young volunteer, to remain in His WORSHIP even through the darkest of moments, remembering His faithfulness, grace, love, hope and promise.

As Jesus said in John 15:4 "Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me.", I thank Joyce for sharing the analogy of the Velcro... that one its own, it proves to be useless but when stuck onto another piece, it can hold things together.

Yes another analogy is that of the "cut-flower Christian" as mentioned in Our Daily Bread:

Cut-Flower Christians

I enjoy buying or receiving a fresh bouquet of cut flowers. After admiring and smelling them, I waste no time getting them into water. Even though fresh and beautiful when I get them, their days are numbered. Because they've been severed from their life-source, they will soon wither and die. I know that one day I will have to throw them away.

Author Lloyd Ogilvie sees in this a picture of the Christian whose spiritual vitality has faded and shriveled. Such a person has become a "cut-flower Christian." Jesus used a similar illustration about a vine and its branches to describe our relationship to Him. Just as a branch can't bear fruit by itself, He explained, we can't bear spiritual fruit unless we abide in Him, the true vine (John 15:4).

If a branch could speak, it wouldn't apologize for its need to depend on the vine for bearing fruit. It would say instead, "For this I was made!" Jesus knew we were made for dependence on Him, our life-source—no apology needed! In fact, such dependence is the only way to avoid becoming a "cut-flower Christian."

Let's embrace His declaration, "Without Me you can do nothing" (John 15:5). As we depend on Him, we will bear much fruit—and for this we were made. —Joanie Yoder — Joanie Yoder
Closer yet I'd cling, dear Savior,
You're the all-sufficient Vine;
You alone can make me fruitful,
Blessed source of strength divine. —Bosch
Fellowship with Christ is the secret of fruitfulness.

Are you a Velcro on your own? Are you a cut-flower Christian? Are you separated from your life-source? The great thing about God is that it is never too late to turn back... remain in His will, His WORK of reaching out to people, His WAY in our daily living, His WORD to guide us in living and living righteously (Ps 119:105 - Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path), His WORSHIP even through the darkest of moments, remembering His faithfulness, grace, love, hope and promise.

Encountering God Through Prayer

Hear Us From Heaven


Lord, hear our cry
Come heal our land
Breath life into these dry and thirsty souls
Lord, hear our prayer
Forgive our sin
And as we call on Your name
Would You make this a place
For Your glory to dwell

Chorus:
Open the blind eyes
Unlock the deaf ears
Come to Your people
As we draw near
Hear us from heaven
Touch our generation
We are Your people
Crying out in desperation

Bridge:
Hear Us From Heaven,
Hear Us From Heaven,
Hear Us From Heaven (4x)

We have started a 6-weeks series on prayer and frankly, the sermons, the preparation for cell group discussion and also reading a book which my sister had bought from Riverside Resource, Too Busy Not to Pray by Bill Hybels, have helped me to start think seriously about prayer and reflecting upon my prayer life.

• Why do we pray?
• Why do we struggle with prayer?
• How do we pray?
  

Beginning on the Right Footing #1: What's Your Attitude towards Prayer?
I myself am coming to learn more about prayer as I reflect and I hope you can share with me your experience and comments too :) As I was preparing for cell discussion, I felt that God was telling me that we need to start our prayer life with the right footing; before we can even talk about how we should pray, we need to understand why we pray and our attitudes about prayer:

• Do we believe in the power of prayer?
• Do we believe that God is willing to hear our prayers?
• Do we believe that God is able to do something about our prayer requests?
  

- Do you believe in the power of prayer?

Bill Hybels says in his book "an archbishop once observed, 'it's amazing how many coincidence occur when one begins to pray.'

As I look back, I see the value of prayer in my spiritual life. I can think of 3 instances specifically where I was awed by the power of prayer.

- Instance #1: God's Protection

The first was when I come to realise how prayer has helped me survive my first time mission trip in 2007. In April 2007, I went for a mission trip for the first time to China and we were there for 18 days. The 18 days were just amazing and it was a time when I became still and saw how great a God we have; a God that provides, watches over and protects. The trip was full of amazing testimonies throughout the 18-days including:

• how my life was preserved as we were making our way up to a village school, how we learnt about a stabbing case that took place where we stayed less than a week before we came,
  
• how the county government initially was not open to our team coming over to provide training and last minutes doors opened for the missionary team to work with them,
  
• how the virginia tech shooting (and the local stabbing case) which happened at the time we were there had provided open opportunities for people to talk about mental health issues (which was what we were doing training for there),
  
• how God brought 2 Singaporeans, who used to work as outdoor trainers, to us to bless us throughout the trip with their expertise
• how these 2 Singaporeans made a last minute decision to follow us on a visit to a missionary at a children's home and then halfway through the visit, the missionary (not knowing that these 2 worked as outdoor trainers) mentioned that he had always wanted to do teambuilding for his children and staff but did not know how to go about it. It's just amazing how God brought them to the home at the right time
• how our team had later also blessed these 2 Singaporeans, providing fellowship and Christian community to one who told us that she was beginning to feel distanced from God and also open opportunities for the other, who is a pre-believer, to learn about Christ. We were told she had been resistant to hearing the gospel but then the visit to the home provided an opportunity for her to hear a testimony of a staff (who did not know she is a pre-believer) and prepared her heart to want to know Christ
• how after 10 years of working with the local authorities and praying for breakthrough, the local government finally initiated working together for the long-term.
• and many others

Then, when I returned, I come to realise that many things went well because we had many prayer warriors behind us, including people we did not know who were also interceding for us at the missions office.

- Instance #2: God Is This Your Will?
The second was when I was called by God to "confront" a friend who was involved in a Korean cult here in Singapore. For a few months, I have been running away from that calling and finally one day, God provided the opportunity for me to invite him out alone (because previous attempts, he always brought someone along to try to "convert" me). I remember being all jittery about it on the day I was to meet him and I kept asking God if this is His will; for me to "confront" this friend about this matter. By the end of the day, I met a colleague (who does not take the train but happened to be taking the train with me on that day) and we chatted. Suddenly, out of her bag, she brought out a book "Knowing God's Will" and lent the book to me, telling me that she had intended to return the book to her church library the previous Sunday but the librarian wanted her to keep and finish reading the book.

Reading that book had also prepared me for what was to happen later; I was to face rejection from my friend. I remember reading from the book about how we sometimes play a small part in God's purposes and we may be laying a brick one at a time as we help build the house, so nothing is wasted although we do not see God's purpose at the point in time we lay the brick. As expected, I felt horrible after the meeting and felt terribly rejected but then I recall what I read. As if to make sure that it sank deep within me, the 'Our Daily Bread' article the next morning was about how we need to work with the Lord when working to save others just as we can put together the ingredients for a cake but ultimately, it is the oven that bakes the cake, not us. Talking about God answering your questions.

- Instance #3: God's Leading
The last instance I can think of is my prayer for my ministry. As I had shared before, I faced much challenges in my initial months of ministry and had wanted to just give up. But each time I made a decision to give up, God spoke through the pulpit. I could not understand what plans God has for me and I kept lamenting and crying out, praying for Him to reveal to me His plans. Breakthrough came months later and it is becoming clear why somethings happened the way it did. God also continue to equip me and lead me as I carried on my ministry and I came to realise that God had never forsaken me even though I faced trials:

Hebrew 13:5b-6
because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." 6. So we say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?"

Isaiah 41:10
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

And many of you also shared how God had answered prayers in your life. So do you believe in the power of prayer?

- Do you believe that God is willing to bless us?
In his book, Bill Hybels shared that God wants to bless you:

Luke 18:1-8 tells of the parable of the persistent widow and even of the judge who neither feared God nor cared for man can relent to help the widow, how much more our God?

Matthew 7:9-11 also reminds us:

9. "Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10. Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11. If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!

Similarly, Leviticus 26:3-6 and Deuteronomy 28:2-6 speaks of how God wants to bless us as long as we seek to obey Him.

So do you believe that God is willing and wants to bless you?

- Do you believe that God is able to do something about our prayer requests?
This really is an interesting question because I believe most would say "yes". But why is it that if we believe He can do something about it and yet we are not fervent in our prayers? The ability and omnipotence of God is shown throughout the bible and also in lives of people in present day but yet why do we doubt?

Beginning on the Right Footing #2: In what state are you approaching God in prayer?

Isaiah 1:15-17
15 When you spread out your hands in prayer,
I will hide my eyes from you;
even if you offer many prayers,
I will not listen.
Your hands are full of blood;

16 wash and make yourselves clean.
Take your evil deeds
out of my sight!
Stop doing wrong,

17 learn to do right!
Seek justice,
encourage the oppressed. [a]
Defend the cause of the fatherless,
plead the case of the widow.

Really, God is holy and how are you approaching the throne of God when you go into a time of prayer. Do you treat God as "santa-claus" and treat prayer as just a time of putting in request for things to be right for you? I remember Elder Andrew Goh once shared about the half prayer (prayer which starts and stops with "God, make this happen, make that happen") versus the full prayer (God, may Your will be done). How do you deal with the sin as you approach the throne of God?

Luke 18: 9-14
9. To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everybody else, Jesus told this parable: 10. "Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11. The Pharisee stood up and prayed about himself: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. 12. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.'

13. "But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, 'God, have mercy on me, a sinner.'

14. "I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted."

God exalts and the one who humbles himself before God and recognises his sins. He looks for the repentent heart. just as Luke 19:1-10 tells us about His encounter with Zacchaeus, the Tax Collector

Luke 19:1-10 Zacchaeus, the Tax Collector
1. Jesus entered Jericho and was passing through. 2. A man was there by the name of Zacchaeus; he was a chief tax collector and was wealthy. 3. He wanted to see who Jesus was, but being a short man he could not, because of the crowd. 4. So he ran ahead and climbed a sycamore-fig tree to see him, since Jesus was coming that way.

5. When Jesus reached the spot, he looked up and said to him, "Zacchaeus, come down immediately. I must stay at your house today." 6. So he came down at once and welcomed him gladly.

7. All the people saw this and began to mutter, "He has gone to be the guest of a 'sinner.' "

8. But Zacchaeus stood up and said to the Lord, "Look, Lord! Here and now I give half of my possessions to the poor, and if I have cheated anybody out of anything, I will pay back four times the amount."

9. Jesus said to him, "Today salvation has come to this house, because this man, too, is a son of Abraham. 10. For the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost."

Even in Genesis 32-33, we see how Jacob seeks to be forgiven and it is a contrast between the way in which he sought forgiveness and blessing from God and from his brother Esau. For God, it did not take goats, ewes, rams, camels, cows, bull and donkeys for Him to forgive because He himself has provided the lamb, Jesus, to die for our sins.

To Live is Christ



I make a vow
My life will always honour you
Whether I live or die

I belong to Him
He bore my sin
I owe this life to my saving King

Hallelujah, I am not my own
You are in control
Hallelujah

For me to live is christ
And to die is gain
No matter what price i pay
I choose to give this life away

Only by the cross I am saved

Do you come before God to confess your sins and be repentent just as Zacchaeus, Jacob and the tax-collector in Luke 18:9-14?

Why do We Pray?
Why do we pray? Is it purely to submit our requests to God and then amen? For many, prayer is...:

• a time of fellowship/communion with God; basking and enjoying His presence and the peace and assurance which comes with it
  
  
  Draw Me Close to You
  
  
  Draw me close to You
  Never let me go
  I lay it all down again
  To hear You say that I'm Your friend
  
  You are my desire
  No one else will do
  'Cause nothing else could take Your place
  To feel the warmth of Your embrace
  Help me find the way
  Bring me back to You
  
  You're all I want
  You're all I've ever needed
  You're all I want
  Help me know You are near
  
  
  
• a time of being humbled because we can sometimes think we are self-sufficient and refuse to take it to the Lord in prayer. Bill Hybels put it nicely to say that prayer is an assault on deep-seated values of self-sufficiency and independent living, which sometimes makes us forget we need God
• a time of confession to fall down on our knees before the Lord and seeking his forgiveness for our sins
• a time of thanksgiving and adoration of how wonderful a God He is
• spiritual warfare as we seek to intercede for others to take them away from the hands of the devil and also sometimes to shut the devil up because he can put thoughts which will serve to bring us away from God. I myself have experienced several negative thoughts about myself and how I am a failure and unable to do what God has called me to do. We need to silence these thoughts and the only way is to be in the presence of God
• a time of refuge in the Lord because sometimes we realise we can do nothing but go down on our knees
  
• a time of being still and seeking God's will in decision and circumstances e.g. before we go into quiet time
  
  Think of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane. He provides the most perfect model of what it is to pray according to God's will. Imagine being in Jesus' shoes and knowing the hour has come to die on the cross and crying out to the Lord, but yet recognising that it is God's will, not his will.
  
  
  I Surrender All
  
  
  All to Jesus I surrender
  All to Him I freely give;
  I will ever love and trust Him,
  In his presence daily live.
  
  I surrender all, I surrender all;
  All to thee, my blessed Savior,
  I surrender all.
  
  All to Jesus I surrender,
  Humbly at His feet I bow,
  Worldly pleasures all forsaken,
  Take me Jesus, take me now.
  
  
  
• a time of placing our request at the feet of God to help us,
  

but my most favourite one is, as I have realised in the past few days:

• Christianity is not a religion but a relationship with God and thus, how can one of the main component of relationship; communication, be left out? God wants to hear from us.

Why Do We Struggle with Prayer?
If we believe in the power of prayer, that God is willing and able to help us then why do we still struggle? Some cite:

• Busyness
• Laziness
• Our deep-seated values of self-sufficiency
• Sin which makes us turn away instead of to God for forgiveness
  
• Shame - some people feel that prayer is an admittance of weakness
• "Don't know how to pray"
  

Bill Hybels observes that it is amazing how sometimes we can put aside time for those things we set to do and learn but then when it comes to prayer, it is a different matter all together. I once was also plagued with the worry that I do not know how to pray properly and may look stupid in front of many people. This has caused me to feel rather awkward at prayer meetings because I am afraid I will not pray properly. But then, I later was ministered to by Matthew 6:5-15:

5. "And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. 6. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. 7. And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. 8. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.

9. "This, then, is how you should pray:
" 'Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name,
10. your kingdom come,
your will be done
on earth as it is in heaven.
11. Give us today our daily bread.
12. Forgive us our debts,
as we also have forgiven our debtors.
13. And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from the evil one.' 14. For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

How Do We Pray?
Personally, I do not think there is a standard way of praying because it is your relationship with God and your way of communicating with God. But some guidelines do exist which can help, until you develop your own. e.g. ACTS:

• Adoration - Praising God for His faithfulness, grace, love, wonders etc
• Confession - Repent and bringing to God your confessions of sin and ask for his forgiveness
• Thanksgiving - Giving thanks to God for all the works He had done in your life
• Supplication - Bring to God your requests

Something else I found:

Use your hand.
Your fingers can be used to bring to mind different things to pray for.

• thumb
  this is the strongest digit on your hand. Give thanks for all the strong things in your life, like home and family, relationships that support and sustain you.
• index finger
  this is the pointing finger. Pray for all those people and things in your life who guide and help you. Friends, teachers, doctors, nurses, emergency services and so on.
• middle finger
  this is the tallest finger. Pray for all the important people who have power in the world, like world leaders and their governments, members of parliament and local councillors, the Royal Family, other world leaders and their governments.
• ring finger
  this is the weakest finger on your hand. It can not do much by itself. Remember the poor, the weak, the helpless, the hungry, the sick, the ill and the bereaved.
• little finger
  this is the smallest and the last finger on your hand. Pray for yourself.

Bill Hybels also chooses to write down his prayers in a journal because it:

• helps him concentrate and be focused
• help him be specific
• help him see how God answers prayers which builds faith

Whatever you do, he encourages us to experiment with different ways to see how it works for us. But still Jesus provided us with the principles in Matthew 6:9-15 about prayer: regular, private, sincere and specific. And there is no substitute to praying except to just do it! No reading of books, researching on the internet is going to help but just do it!

So what are you going to do to raise the value of prayer in your walk with the Lord? What is different now and what can be different?

From FAI-lure to FAI-thfulness

Hi everyone,

Thanks for allowing me to share on Friday and for sharing with me too.

My Thanksgiving
I began by thanking God and as I looked through my weeks, I realised I had so much to thank God for:

1. I thank God for work; how he had moderated my work these few weeks especially when I wasn't feeling very well... there are just days when my volunteer mailbox had no emails to attend to and this is just rare considering that it is supposed to be a peak period with my fundraising project going on
2. I thank God for my dad's health; that he is cleared of Lymphoma, TB and HIV, although there is a chance that his current medical condition may lead to Lymphoma but then there is nothing I can do now except to trust God.
   
3. I thank God for my bonus and the recognition I have received at work be it from management or from volunteers and their parents
4. I thank God for showing me how there are still nice people throughout the time I did kettling and for sending passionate volunteers to me to busk in their passion to help
5. I thank God for my leg that the pain seems to be going away
6. I thank God for bringing comfort to me throughout the past 2-3 weeks and for speaking to me, by sending friends, bible verses to encourage and also through sharings by Nick Vujicic and Nanz-Chong Komo. I thank God for working with my negative emotions in my life.
   
7. I thank God for watching over a friend spiritually
   

On Failures
I thank God for bringing to me Isaiah 41:8-20 in time to share with cell. I was at a loss not knowing what to share for cell on Friday but God, you brought the verse to minister to me when one of my colleague opened his diary and there staring at me was Isaiah 41:10:

So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

It is interesting how so many bible verses were given to me this week but none spoke to me at such a deep level than this. It became clear that God had wanted me to share about the topic of failure and our propensity to feel we are so. God brought Nick, then Nanz and then He brought me Isaiah 41:8-20 and showed me how (i) He have chosen us and not rejected us; in fact we sometimes reject ourselves (v8-9), (ii) that we should not fear as God is with us (v10) and (iii) that through our weakness, God's glory will be shown as we stand as wonderful testimonies of His work (v18-20).

Hanging On to our Faith
Following Nanz's sharing, it became clear to me upon reflection that I am still learning to hang in there and trust God because sometimes when the tough gets going, it can be tough to hang on. But, I have learnt how the following have helped me to navigate through tough times:

1. How I still trust that God is real and in control from how I see Him work on a daily basis in my life; even though sometimes it takes a little reminding, I have come to trust that He has His plans for me (Jer 29:11)
2. How I stuck on in God's community because it is tempting to just pack and leave. God DO send people to uplift me, even though sometimes in surprising ways. I have also learnt that God can send people but then it is whether we sometimes open ourselves to help from them
   
3. How keeping a thankful heart (1 Thess 5:18) and seeing how God work in my life, through regular thanksgiving and through journalling have helped me to continue to have trust in Him.
4. How I believe I can claim on His promise made that He has His plans for my ministry and when He send me verses, circumstances, people and sharing to encourage me on, I can claim that promise

How are you keeping on?


Rescue
You are the source of life
I can`t be left behind
No one else will do
I will take hold of you

Chorus:
Cause I need you jesus
To come to me rescue
Where else can I go
There's no other name
By which I am saved
capture me with grace
I will follow you
I will follow you

My heart is your for life
I need your hand in mine
No one else will do
I put my trust in you

Bridge
I will follow you (This world has nothing for me)
I will follow you (This world has nothing for me)
I will follow you (This world has nothing for me)

Devotion on Patience

Hi everyone,

We recently covered the topic of patience at our department devotion, so thought of sharing it here for comments and discussion :)

God is often more patient with us than we are with ourselves. We assume that if we fall, we aren't born again. If we stumble, then we aren't truly converted. If we have the old desires, then we must not be a new creation.

If you are anxious about this, please remember, "God began doing a good work in you, and I am sure he will continue it until it is finished when Jesus Christ comes again". (Phil. 1:6)

"We also have joy with our troubles, because we know that these troubles produce patience. And patience produces character, and character produces hope. And this hope will never disappoint us, because God has poured out his love to fill our hearts." Romans 5:3-5

"We have around us many people whose lives tell us what faith means. So let us run the race that is before us and never give up. We should remove from our lives anything that would get in the way and the sin that so easily holds us back. Let us look only to Jesus, the One who began our faith and who makes it perfect." Hebrews 12:1-2a

"My brothers and sisters, when you have many kinds of troubles, you should be full of joy, because you know that these troubles test your faith, and this will give you patience. Let your patience show itself perfectly in what you do. Then you will be perfect and complete and will have everything you need." James 1:2-4nds of troubles, you should be full of joy, because you know that these troubles test your faith, and this will give you patience. Let your patience show itself perfectly in what you do. Then you will be perfect and complete and will have everything you need." James 1:2-4

Why does scripture says that we should have joy and be full of joy when we face trials?

• It is not saying that we should deny our negative feelings about trials and feel joyful that we have trials
  
• Difference lies in that we can have the assurance of Christ in us and in our lives, that He has His plans for us and will see us through

Why are there trials?

• I guess that is a question no one can answer but we can be certain that trials are part and parcel of life because we will (i) face trials when we go through the different stages in life and (ii) the devil do taunts you as well along the way, and/or (iii) sometimes we can be stubborn and refuse to "let go and let God", among many other reasons.
• But one thing about the scriptures is that it says "trials produced patience and patience produced character and character produces hope" (Romans 5:3-5)
• To me, the last 2 years of spiritual growth (ever since I have returned to the Lord from backsliding) had been most intense. Sometimes, I go through trials e.g. my trials in leading cell, and cry out to the Lord, not understanding why I am made to go through these trials. But upon reflecting, through the trials, I have learnt:
  • How God uses me and my experience to minister to others - Just like how He recently used my experience facing career crisis to minister to a sister-in-christ, who was going through a similar situation. Both of us placed our self-worth on our jobs rather on God. By the end of the session and sharing, we both come to recognise that we can choose to place our self-worth in people and jobs (which may fail us at times) or on God (who never fails)
  • How to rely on God - At times, maybe due to stubbornness, we refuse to "Let go and Let God" and it is through the various trials I faced these 2 years which have helped me to learn the hard way to rely on Christ and indeed, He never fails, just like how He is blessing my cell leadership now and I thank God for that
  • How God uses trials to build character, both for ourselves and for our ministry
  • How God is in control and has His plans for us: Jeremiah 29:11

How do we respond in times of trials?

• Trials are for certain here to stay but then the important thing is how do we respond to God when we face trials? Sometimes, we trust God and hold on, sometimes we start to doubt God, sometimes we lament to God, sometimes we lift up our fists to God etc
  
• But we have seen how God has sustained people and used people's trials for good e.g. Nick Vujicic and Joni Eareckson. I cannot imagine myself living their lives. In the words of Nick, "it is not as if one morning he woke up and have this confidence but it is a journey, it is character building". He had the willingness to let God use him to share the gospel
• So how do we we respond? Is it: Trials-Triumph (in Christ)-Testimony (of God's grace, faithfulness and work in your life)
• Do we beat ourselves up, despite having been saved, that we still stumble and sin? But we are reminded that we are work-in-progress and Phil 1:6 reminds us of that. But do we suffer from the, as Sy Rogers call it, "Dirty Diaper Syndrome"; when children mess up, some run away from parents (because maybe they fear being scolded) but all the parent want to do is clean you up (and maybe nag or scold a little).
  
  So when we mess up, do we run from or to God? Do we become so disappointed that we run away from God? If God can send Christ to die on the cross and forgive all who have yet to even ask for forgiveness, what more the power of coming before the cross, confessing our sins and repenting?
  
  Romans 5:5 reminds "And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." He has and will continue to do so.

Psalm 37:23
23. If the LORD delights in a man's way,
he makes his steps firm;

24. though he stumble, he will not fall,
for the LORD upholds him with his hand.

Radical Trust

Isaiah 43:1-13 (NIV):
1 But now, this is what the LORD says—
he who created you, O Jacob,
he who formed you, O Israel:
"Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.

2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.

3 For I am the LORD, your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;
I give Egypt for your ransom,
Cush [a] and Seba in your stead.

4 Since you are precious and honored in my sight,
and because I love you,
I will give men in exchange for you,
and people in exchange for your life.

5 Do not be afraid, for I am with you;
I will bring your children from the east
and gather you from the west.

6 I will say to the north, 'Give them up!'
and to the south, 'Do not hold them back.'
Bring my sons from afar
and my daughters from the ends of the earth-

7 everyone who is called by my name,
whom I created for my glory,
whom I formed and made."

8 Lead out those who have eyes but are blind,
who have ears but are deaf.

9 All the nations gather together
and the peoples assemble.
Which of them foretold this
and proclaimed to us the former things?
Let them bring in their witnesses to prove they were right,
so that others may hear and say, "It is true."

10 "You are my witnesses," declares the LORD,
"and my servant whom I have chosen,
so that you may know and believe me
and understand that I am he.
Before me no god was formed,
nor will there be one after me.

11 I, even I, am the LORD,
and apart from me there is no savior.

12 I have revealed and saved and proclaimed—
I, and not some foreign god among you.
You are my witnesses," declares the LORD, "that I am God.

13 Yes, and from ancient days I am he.
No one can deliver out of my hand.
When I act, who can reverse it?"

How many times have we found ourselves facing someone in crisis and saying "Don't worry, God is in control". But the question is really, why do we need to have trust, or rather radical trust in God?

In this week's OTC reading, we read about Hezekiah and how he was faced with a threat of attack by Sennacherib, King of Assyria, and despite being chastised by him (2 Chronicles 32:10-19), Hezekiah nonetheless responded in trust in the Lord and "cried out in prayer to heaven about this";

Isaiah 37: 14-20 (NIV)
14. Hezekiah received the letter from the messengers and read it. Then he went up to the temple of the LORD and spread it out before the LORD.
15. And Hezekiah prayed to the LORD :
16. "O LORD Almighty, God of Israel, enthroned between the cherubim, you alone are God over all the kingdoms of the earth. You have made heaven and earth.
17. Give ear, O LORD, and hear; open your eyes, O LORD, and see; listen to all the words Sennacherib has sent to insult the living God.
18. "It is true, O LORD, that the Assyrian kings have laid waste all these peoples and their lands.
19. They have thrown their gods into the fire and destroyed them, for they were not gods but only wood and stone, fashioned by human hands.
20. Now, O LORD our God, deliver us from his hand, so that all kingdoms on earth may know that you alone, O LORD, are God. "

And we read that in the end:

2 Chronicles 32:21 (NIV)
21. And the LORD sent an angel, who annihilated all the fighting men and the leaders and officers in the camp of the Assyrian king. So he withdrew to his own land in disgrace. And when he went into the temple of his god, some of his sons cut him down with the sword.

Perhaps radical trust would mean to have having trust in something which under normal circumstances, others would not have. I check with the dictionary revealed that the word "radical" has quite a few meanings, one meaning "extreme" while another referring to that forming a basis or foundation. But I do agree with yesterday's discussion that the focus should not be on the definition because "radical trust" would be different for everyone at different points in time. For someone, radical trust might be trusting in God for matters ranging from exams to going away to serve full-time as a missionary. As Arun points out, someone may find "going to cell on Friday night while others may spend it resting or chilling out" radical. I believe God meets each of us at our varying levels of our faith.

But back to the fundamental question on why is "radical trust" in God necessary? Some have shared how having radical trust in God, though nerve-wrecking because sometimes it does not make human sense, helps us live out our lives according to God's purposes and plans. I have shared how Jeremiah 29:11 have brought me back to Christ after having backslided away from Christ for 15 years. Just at the point in time I was facing crisis in some relationships in my life and in my work, I remember telling myself I will not work in a Christian organisation (because I had backslided) but God had His plans to, within a few days bring me back to Christ and subsequently to a Christian organisation to work. But how do we build trust?

1. Testimonies - hearing testimonies help us know how real God is in others' lives as well as our lives. Hearing from others help us build our faith while sharing our testimonies help edify another while remind us of how God has worked in our lives. Do we remember God's faithfulness or are we like the Israelites in the bible who constantly forgets God's faithfulness and/or take it for granted?
   
2. Reading the Word of God - I believe that God sometimes seek to encourage and assure through His Word and by reading His Word, we will come to open up communication channels with God
3. Prayer - Some have also shared how prayer with God also helps build faith as we commit our lives and circumstances into His hands and keep communication channels open
4. Believing in and Obeying God - Some shared that it is not enough just to only read the Word of God if we do not know and fear God. Trusting in God also means obeying Him under every circumstances. Once you know God for who He is, we will come to know His character as our Father and how real He is. He comforts, assures, encourage but also disciplines. Obeying Him may sometimes mean doing His will even if it does not make human sense. Some have also shared how obeying Him in every little small decisions and big decisions and making it into a lifestyle has also helped to build trust.
   
5. Learning from Other's Faith - Some even shared how they learnt from others' faith, even faith of children and loved ones who show us what it is to simply have faith in God.
   

But another question which crossed my mind is that whether does radical trust have a negative flipside to it? Can trust be misplaced? Well, the answer is fundamentally yes. We can simply ask ourselves, where do we have our trust in? Sennacherib asked in 2 Chronicles:10 "On what are you basing your confidence, that you remain in Jerusalem under siege?" In Isaiah 7:3-9, the Lord spoke to Isaiah and asked him to speak to Ahaz about an impending invasion:

Isaiah 7:7-9 (NIV):
7. Yet this is what the Sovereign LORD says:
" 'It will not take place,
it will not happen,
8. for the head of Aram is Damascus,
and the head of Damascus is only Rezin.
Within sixty-five years
Ephraim will be too shattered to be a people.
9. The head of Ephraim is Samaria,
and the head of Samaria is only Remaliah's son.
If you do not stand firm in your faith,
you will not stand at all.'

Where is your trust in? Who is your head? Is it the Lord or man?

Psalm 118:8 (NIV):
It is better to take refuge in the LORD
than to trust in man

I watched a recent movie called "Rendition" and it was indeed sad to see how a terrorist group was made to believe that they have to sacrifice their bodies, blowing themselves into pieces, for the sake of God; to be answerable to God how they have used the "weapon" God has given them for His sake. Deep within me, I was rather uncomfortable how God can be used and/or misinterpreted by man to cause pain and terror.

So what is your level and trust and where is your trust in?

He Never Sleeps


Great is Thy Faithfulness


Still